I understand that most of us aren’t watching reality television for musical inspiration. And it isn’t unfair to say that we aren’t exactly treated to Carnegie Hall levels of performance when it comes to Bravo Housewives or their gala affairs. What we can say is they are entertaining.
Let’s reminisce on our some of the most enjoyable, and, yes, hilarious musical moments of Housewives past.
5. Kim Zolciak-Biermann, The Real Housewives of Atlanta
Bless Kim Zolciak-Biermann’s heart. Breakout pop sensation Kim did a very, very brave thing. On the Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Season 2 reunion, under the bemused smirks of her co-stars and a giddy Andy Cohen, Kim debuted her new single, Tardy for the Party. As the catchy club beat began to fill the room, Lisa Wu had to tap into a completely different level of consciousness to refrain from laughing. NeNe Leakes…, well NeNe was probably silently thanking the Bravo gods this was actually happening in front of her. Kim had two backup dancers in black bodysuits undulating franticly behind her as she repeatedly advised the audience not to be late for the festivities. It was a treat for all senses as Kim managed to defy being in tune to the backing track for most of the performance.
10/10 Would recommend.
4. Luann de Lesseps, The Real Housewives of New York
Picture it, the glory days of Real Housewives of New York. Season 5, episode 10 and it’s a beautiful holiday season in Manhattan. The streets are decorated. The air is filled with the crisp hope of an approaching New Year. And Countess Luann de Lesseps was going to throw a festive soireé!
But something in the egg nog wasn’t clean because the band Lu hired put on quite a naughty show. Allegedly Lu didn’t treat the musicians with Countess Class. Now these aren’t the guys you wanted to mess with, they are punk rock. They will publicly humiliate you and that’s exactly what they did. It was GLORIOUS. To the tune of everyone’s favorite, Jingle Bells, the singer began screaming, “I want to F#@& You In The A$$!”. I mean, the shocked looks of the partygoers were amazing. No one could believe what was happening. Absolutely legendary scene.
11/10 Would recommend, especially if you’re in a bad mood.
3. Gretchen Rossi, The Real Housewives of Orange County
Oh yeah, you knew it was coming. It was like a fever dream when Real Housewives of Orange County star Gretchen Rossi proposed to her longtime love, Slade Smiley (gulp). Choices, amirite? Her song was called, The Time Is Now, and I’m not sure any of us have fully recovered. It was during a brief moment when Slade was employed at a radio station and his co-host surprised him with the ballad. As tears rolled down Slade’s face, a helicopter was waiting to whisk him off to this completely real and totally not just for the cameras meaningful moment. With lyrics like, “You’ve been there every time my life seemed broken. There’s no question you’re the one I’ve chosen,” how could Slade resist? This was about 13 years ago and they still aren’t married.
4/4 Desperate, but funny.
2. Aviva Drescher, The Real Housewives of New York
Real Housewives of New York alum Aviva Drescher is a legend in these parts. Specifically the leg parts. No one will ever forget Aviva’s iconic moment when she threw her prosthetic leg on the dinner table at a fancy party to make a point. But I also remember in Season 5 when Sonja Morgan was asked to plan an anniversary party for Aviva and her husband, Reid Drescher. Sonja’s choice of a musical guest was a Britney Spears kind of situation and a guitar player who may or may not have shown up for sound check. The singer, clad in a corset and fur collars around her neck and wrists proceeded to serenade poor, unsuspecting Aviva and Reid. As the camera pans to the audience, Countess Luann and co-star Heather Thomson aren’t quite tipsy enough to act like any of this is normal. Naturally Aviva played it off and remained unbothered. If you remember her father, you know it takes a lot of phase ‘ol Aviva.
10/10 Definitely hilarious.
1. Melissa Gorga, The Real Housewives of New Jersey
Who could forget when Real Housewives of New Jersey gave us Melissa Gorga, the future pop star. Her beloved husband, Joe Gorga built a recording studio in the basement of their mansion so she wouldn’t have to leave his sight. And then one night, Season 3 episode 5, the viewing audience was treated to Melissa singing Amazing Grace from inside her closet. Joe shushed their tiny children so they too could listen to the lilting sounds of, “Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound that saved a WENCH like me…..” I remember watching this in real time and laughing so hard I required the use of an inhaler to make sure I didn’t pass out. If you haven’t seen it, go watch it immediately. 10/10 Her best performance.
TELL US- WHAT IS YOUR FUNNIEST MUSICAL MEMORY? DO YOU AGREE WITH THIS LIST? WHICH ONES WOULD YOU ADD?
[Photo Credit: Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images]